My dear friends, dear followers,
does God know us by name?
Many of us confess this - and many collect signs of God's love.
This practice is viewed critically by those who say it is omen-seeking. And yes, it can indeed degenerate into one.
My love tokens of God - they are not heart stones or heart clouds, although I love them.
No, my love signs of God are the ones I rarely see: shooting stars and ... squirrels.
Why on earth squirrels?
Well, to understand that, the first thing you need to know is that they are rather rare in Germany. Sometimes a few live in tall fir trees on neighboring properties, sometimes you see one in the park. But they are not omnipresent, they appear and disappear just as quickly.
I love squirrels because there is something innocent about them. They are alive, radiate joy and are so graceful. In short, they are one of my favorite animals, just like dogs, eagles or robins are for other people.
Whenever I need God's reassurance, whenever I need a gentle hug, one crosses my path. It flits across the path. It sits on the tree. And every time I smile, every time I feel loved. "God does not forget me. God sees me, loves me, carries me. God sends his greetings into our real world."
For a long time I have accepted that I recognize God's love in them, without being able to name exactly why squirrels of all things are my signs of love.
Two years ago, however, something happened that I never digested: someone said to me, quite spitefully, that it could also be Satan who was sending me the squirrels, after all "the devil is a squirrel". It stole my joy, unsettled me, and in fact I have rarely seen them since. Rarer than before. And with the feeling that something has been stolen from me: A sign of intimacy between God and me that is nobody's business, nobody's business but ours.
A few days ago, I was scrolling through the internet when I landed on a nun's website. A beautiful page that radiated joy in God. Shortly afterwards, I chose a squirrel as an accompanying image for an article, not even particularly consciously.
It was God who then resolved:
Suddenly I saw myself standing in one of those old train compartments on trains of the 80s. A nun was sitting in front of me. I might have been eight or nine years old, maybe a little younger - a small, lively girl who was on a long journey with her mother to visit her grandmother.
I talked to her, asked her who she was. And why she was wearing such strange clothes, that hood, that robe. She laughed, she explained to me that she only lived for Jesus, that she was in a religious order and wore this habit as a sign that she only belonged to him.
My eyes lit up. Yes, I only belonged to Jesus too! I told her that I only ever wanted to belong to Jesus and that I loved him - but that when I grew up, I wouldn't want to wear a habit like that. Perhaps a little afraid that Jesus might demand that of me.
She assured me that this was a voluntary, serious life decision and that I didn't have to.
A few weeks later, back at home, I received a parcel. It was from the sister. She wrote warm lines about how Jesus would always love me and that I should keep my joy in him. And in the parcel .... was a squirrel.
You know: Jesus knows us. He was there when I met this woman, he heard the conversation. And this squirrel, which I had already completely forgotten, carried the message: "God does not forget you. God loves you and you keep your joy in him."
Even when I forgot - the nun, the squirrel - Jesus did not forget. And so squirrels run across my path at regular intervals, making me smile.
I thank this woman from the bottom of my heart for the gift of a sign of God's love.
And I thank God that he makes sure that I am regularly reminded of what I said: "Belong to God, yes, I want that too. Serving Jesus, yes, I want that too. But I don't want to be a nun."
So: When someone says that something is their special message of love from God:
You don't know the whole story. Hold back from judging it. In any case, I look forward to my next encounter with one of these wonderful beings.
Nothing that shapes us escapes God's attention. And at the right moments, he can piece together, reveal and make evident what it's really all about.
May God bless this sister, abundantly and joyfully - wherever she is today. She has given me more than she can ever know.
And maybe - yes, maybe - she has even laid the foundation for me to think that packages are the best way to shower another person with God's love like with a cornucopia. After all, you never know what will come of it.
Be blessed.
And think signs of love are possible.
Daughter of Zion.